Contest: Name the Book I Wrote

I just completed writing the manuscript for a book on how to learn spoken Mandarin Chinese. The only thing missing at this point is the title. That’s where you come in. I’ve got the subtitle (see below), but I would love to hear your ideas for catchy, suitable, and generally makes-everyone-who-sees-this-book-want-to-buy-it kinds of titles. In fact, since you’re going to be doing me a huge favor, and spending a lot of creative energy, I’d even be willing to make it worth your while. How about we have a little contest:



  1. Contestants may submit title suggestions in the comments section of this post until I close the comments for this post.
  2. Comments will close at Beijing Time 12:01 AM, Friday, Aug 24 (which is Pacific Time 9:01 AM, Thursday, Aug 23).
  3. Contestants may submit multiple titles in the same comment or in separate comments (so keep thinking).
  4. If two duplicate titles are submitted by different contestants, the first person to submit it will be considered that title’s “creator.”
  5. Any titles submitted that appear to be irrelevant to the book or inappropriate for this contest will be deleted.
  6. After Phase 1 is finished and the titles have all been submitted, I will choose my favorite ones and create a new blog post with some sort of voting poll (does anyone know a good one for WordPress?). We will all vote on our favorite title.
  7. After the results of the voting are in I will choose the title I would like to put on the cover of my book and announce the winner on this site.

The Prize:

  • If you are the creator of a title that has been posted in the comments section of this website that ends up making it onto the cover of the book when it gets published, I’ll announce your name on this website AND you’ll get a free copy of the book. So please, include your real email address and name as you want it to appear when submitting your entries. Your email address will NOT be made public.
  • Subscribe to receive email updates or RSS updates including the beginning of the voting phase and the ultimate winner.

About the Book:

I thought it would help get your creative juices flowing if I told you a little bit about the book you’re trying to name.

It contains tips and strategies for learning spoken Mandarin Chinese, some of which are already published on this blog. The book and accompanying CD set don’t get into learning the hanzi characters at all (but they’re included of course). The sentence examples and vocabulary in this book are all chosen for maximum usefulness using common vocabulary that reflects the way people in China really talk every day. The CD recordings are of male and female native speakers pronouncing vocabulary and sentence examples. A few examples of my blog posts that have been included are:

So now the only thing left to do is imagine what text belongs between the brackets:

[Title Here]

Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese

By Albert Wolfe

(I’ll take out the word “Chinese” from the subtitle if it appears in the main title).


  1. 1) Mandarin: Talk the Talk
    2) Mandarin: Beyond “Ni Hao”
    3) Mandarin: Not just an Orange
    4) Mandarin: Fluency Faster

  2. The Art Of Speaking Chinese: How Not To Accidentally Sell Your Cousin’s Children When Trying To Purchase Lunch”

  3. Flustered to Fluent: Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese
    By Albert W

    Untying your tongue: Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese
    By Albert W

    Mastering Mandarin: Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese
    By Albert W

  4. Sup Albert! way to go bro!

    1) Albert’s Guide to World Peace.
    2) Learnin Mandarin the Feng-Shui-Wolfe way!
    3) SpeakEasy Chinese

    Eh… They kinda suck…

    anyway, good work!

  5. 1) Laowai’s Lessons to Learning Chinese (LLLC)
    2) Chinese Ain’t so Hard!
    3) You Need to Learn Some Chinese…

  6. 1. Wok on the Wild Side
    2. Wok to Remember
    3. Wok Your Talk
    4. Watch That Tone of Voice
    5. Chinese Recall

  7. “Learn how to speak Kevin
    Mo-Wong ‘s language, since he doesn’t know how.”

    “It all sounds greek to me.”

    “Learn what the ladies at the nail shop are really saying about you.”

    “You don’t speak Chinese? Anybody who’s anybody speaks chinese.”

    “Me Chinese, me play joke…”
    (kevin’s suggestion)

    “If your happy and you know it learn Chinese.”

    “Chinese for me, chinese for you, Would you like to learn too?”

  8. “Learning Chinese – A comprehensive HOWTO” (yes, changed subtitle, too).

    “Understanding Chinese – Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin”

    “Approaching Chinese – Reasonable learning strategies for spoken Mandarin”

    “Chinese is not that hard – Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin”

    There are some useful combinations of those, too.

    PS: The comments RSS for this article is broken – gets only forwarded to

  9. 1) Crazy Chinese
    2) Chinese
    3) Magic Chinese
    4) Chinese in USA
    5) Bridge to China
    6) Hello! Chinese
    7) Easy Chinese Easy to learn!
    8) Let’s learn it!
    9) Go for Chinese !

  10. I am so proud of you! What a fantastic accomplishment! Ok, thinking cap on…

    Mandarin Mouth: Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese by Albert W

    More than a Mouthful of Mandarin: Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese by Albert W

    My Mandarin Manual: Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese by Albert W

    Best to you!
    Rena and Jesse

  11. “Mandarin”
    or maybe…
    how about…

    “Barrier Breaker: How to Learn Mandarin Chinese”

    “Rockn’ in China – Learning The music of Spoken Mandarin”

    “Speech 101, The Middle Kingdom Way”

  12. Ni Hao, Xiao Mao
    Learn Chinese… While It’s Still Optional
    Learn to Speak With Your Future Overlords
    Everybody’s Doing It, and So Can You!

  13. 1.Learning Chinese,Follow me!
    2.Mandarin,not that mysterious.
    3.Albert’s Guide to Mandarin
    4.Easy Method,Easy Chinese
    6.Albert in Chinese

  14. Hmm. This is quite a difficult task. The problem (I find) with a lot of titles for language books (not just Chinese) is that the titles, though self-explanatory, are either really boring, slightly patronising, or totally unrealistic, e.g. “Learn Chinese in 30 days!” (as if…). A good title I saw for a book about Latin is “Amo, Amas, Amat and all that…”, which is interesting and also shows instantly shows which language it is about. The problem is that Chinese isn’t yet well-enough known for a title using Chinese to be instantly recognisable I guess….

    I’m rubbish at titles too. I wrote a book, chose a title and then was mostos annoyed when six months later a book in a similar genre was published with almost exactly the same title! Which shows how imaginative my titles are.

    Anyway, I’ll put my thinking cap on. 🙂

  15. You Can Speak It If You Want
    – learning Mandarin Chinese

    Learning To Speak The Complex Mandarin Language

    Albert – I can only assume that you have been learning to speak the language – an excellent accomplishment. John Rowe

  16. Mandarin for Foreigners

    Shortcuts to Speaking Mandarin

    Mandarin: Communicating and Understanding Chinese Culture

    Digging into Chinese

  17. Well Albert, I’m not too good at things like this, but I’m sure my dad can help! Many of these are funny 😉 Good Luck!!!

    Habla Chinese!!
    Viva Mandarin!

    tee hee!

  18. I’m gonna break my own “rule” here:

    Mother, hemp, horse, curse, ? – Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese

    I told you I was bad at this! ^_^

  19. Kung Pao What?! The Art of Learning Chinese
    Learn Chinese So Your PenPal Knows What You’re Saying
    Chinglish, An American’s Quest To Learn Chinese
    Chinese For Dummies
    Chinese, More Than A Fortune Cookie
    Digging A Hole To China (or After You’ve Dug A Hole To China)

  20. Wow! Congratulations!!! No catchy titles yet from me… but why not make it have something to do with not having a title? Name that Phrase! or At a Loss For Mandarin?

  21. Talk Like Me for Much Less: How to Speak Chinese
    Make Business Personal by Learning Mandarin
    Brandon’s Language Book Written by Albert W
    Teaching English in Chinese in Reverse

    For more interesting titles please reply to the included address.

  22. My Life in China: A Language Learning Process
    > An American Wolfe in China (a pun from the movie: An American
    Werewolf in
    > London, ever seen it? cool movie.)
    > Learning Chinese: An Intensive Approach
    > Learning Chinese: A Practical Approach
    > Learning Chinese: An Interactive Approach
    > Learning Chinese Through Teaching English
    > My Experience in China: As Seen Through the Eyes of An English
    > The Secret of Learning Chinese
    > Confessions of an English Teacher on Learning Chinese
    > True Tales of An English Teacher in China
    > Learn Chinese in (number) Easy Steps!
    > Mastering the Chinese Language: From an English Teacher’s Perspective
    > The Wolfe Manuscript on the Chinese Language
    > Learn Chinese? Yes! The Wolfe Way.

  23. Speak Easy Chinese: A Simplified Guide to Breaking down “The Walls” of the Mandarin Language

  24. OK, Albert. Here goes:

    Practical Mandarin
    Mandarin without Walls or…
    Mandarin without Barriers
    Mandarin On the Go

    Best of luck!

  25. Learn to speak the world’s Majority Language

    Good Fortune — to speak Chinese

    Man, da are in China for Dummies

    Well, Albert, here are a few suggestions. I’m sorry it didn’t go as planned, but all this publicity should make it even better. You may have a best seller here!

    Best wishes.


  26. The Ultimate Guide to Madarin Chinese
    Fluent Madarin Chinese in Just 3 Minutes (Results may vary)
    Secrets of Speaking Madarin Chinese Like a Local
    Everything You’ll Ever’Need to Teach Yourself Chinese
    An Insider’s Guide to Learning Chinese
    The Authoritative Guide to Teaching Yourself Chinese
    Absolut Mandarin
    Effective Chinese: The Everday Language of China

    That’s all for now. Way to go and good luck.

  27. Putting on a Good Tone – Tips and Strategies for Learning to Speak and Understand Mandarin Chinese

  28. This is a sweet opportunity, Albert! It’s awesome. I wish I could think of a title for you, but all that comes to mind seem to be in violation of rule #5 above (“I Rove Rearning Ranguages!”, “All Our Base are NOT Belong to Them”, etc. I’ll try to think of something more proper.

  29. [Beyond the Ching-Chong]
    I love Mandarin and don’t think this is an offensive title at all, especially with the subtitle.

  30. Great Job!
    There is a lot of bad books out there. Your web site has been filling an important gap.
    Here are some suggestions from me:

    Let’s speak the “middle language”

    Laowai Chinese 老外中文

    Chinese for Everyone

    Let’s discover Chinese

    What Chinese is all about

    NiHao – 你好

    The toolbox for learning Chinese

    The dragon gate to Chinese

    Dragon and Phoenix

    Yī, èr, sān…

    Building a bridge to China

    I may come up with some more..
    I really love your site!!
    Thanks for doing it.

    Anna B (Swedish in USA learning Mandarin)

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